A solid dozen!

Located in a shopping center in Tyler.
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No, seriously

Whenever I put things here, I tend to take them (or mean them) seriously. Last year, while going through a very difficult time, I mentioned to a friend just how much I needed to feed my creative side. That was a serious need then, and it remains a serious need today. I’ve gone through some super tough things over the past 9 months or so, and not having the time to actually feed that creative need has mostly been tied to survival (y’ know….making $).

My job is not so bad. It’s not wonderful, but the stress is mostly manageable. However, my job (routinely speaking, of course) REALLY lacks a sense of immediacy in terms of results. My job is (mostly) a process-oriented job….it (can mostly take) YEARS to see the results of my efforts….and even those results are usually quite minor. I really super absolutely badly need to see some results in terms of my life/time/motions/words/thoughts/actions….and I COMPLETELY mean that. No, I’m not my job. Yes, I ‘asked’ my job to define who/what I was for FAR TOO VERY LONG, and I’m working super hard to get beyond that kind of garbage-based thinking. But, in terms of the hours I have in each day, AND the number of hours I have left on this Earth…..heck, realistically, I might have 10,500 days left (even that might be a teeny bit generous). I just really need to SEE the fruits of my labors/actions.

None of this should indicate that I’ve been up to nothing creatively over the past 30 years…….far from it, actually. But: I just need to see and record more. I’ve actually done quite a bit of citizen journalism over the past 8 years (in a wide variety of contexts/flavors) and that matter to me, it really does. God knows I have very little free time right now, but I still must press forward on this….I just have to. But I just need to see some stuff that I/others can put our hands on, y’know? So: I’m going to do that, and I’m going to try to document a bit of that along the way here……while still (largely) keeping my anonymity going here. Yep…..so, here ‘goes!

When is an ‘Expert’ not an expert?

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/70-year-old-waco-texas-man-convicted-of-killing-in-laws-scheduled-for-execution/ar-BBUcv90?li=BBnbfcL

The above link leads to an article about Billy Wayne Cobble……a man currently incarcerated in a Texas prison. Mr. Coble is set to be the oldest man ever executed in the Texas penal system. But this post isn’t really about Mr. Coble’s execution……it’s about a psychiatrist who testified on behalf of the state many years ago. I’ll let you get into it, but I think (only from what little bit I’ve read) that the defense did an excellent job of trying to show that this psychiatrist was REALLY doing some janky crystal ball-gazing about how this man MIGHT act in the future. Apparently, the defense’s efforts weren’t good enough, but the good doctor predicted that the man WOULD BE VIOLENT at a later time even in prison (he wasn’t, but the way)….which contributed to him being re-sentenced to death after a 2nd swing at his penalty phase. Simply being a psychiatrist doesn’t automatically make you an expert, particularly on how someone MIGHT BEHAVE in prison at a later time.

Ludum Dare 27

Ludum Dare 27…….Theme: 10 seconds

I love PC games…….always have. ‘Ludum Dare’ (I think its Latin) is a long-standing game jam. Typically, game creators are given a theme and they have 72 hours to create a game from scratch. I chose Ludum Dare #27 from August 2013 at random and I’m going to spend the next few days playing many of those submitted games and reviewing them here. Why? Because my ‘blog needs a bit of levity……things have been TOO SERIOUS around here lately! So, check back often.

Loneliness

I (mostly) try to be careful not to reveal too much about who I am (IRL) on this blog. I’m not sure I do a good job, but still, I try to be careful. My wife and I separated not too long ago…..just a few weeks, actually. I’d known about her wishes for about 2 months. Long story short: I had been struggling so very badly with loneliness and sadness for such a long time, and its reasonable to say she’d had some struggle too.  I’ve been working on/getting help with my feelings for a while now and I feel MUCH better and I am working very hard on being more socially connected too (with real people and real relationships).

The link below leads to an AMAZING article on loneliness in these modern times….and I connected to it very strongly. Maybe, had I have read it a year ago, things might’ve been a little smoother……I doubt it would’ve ‘fixed’ our troubles, but y’know.

Loneliness article